This Is Bad Comedy: Transformers 360 Impressions

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The Transformers saga in all of its different forms has always been a story of conflict, so it stands to reason that the Transformers movie video game developed by Travellers Tales would follow suit. I just hoped it be a conflict between Autobots and Decepticons on my television screen instead of the conflict between critical gamer and drooling TF fan inside of me. Unfortunately that is what it comes to. As I come down off of my initial "OMG is Optimus Prime," high I am left feeling strangely unfulfilled.
By this point you know about the basics. Transformers is a free-roaming mission based game which lets you choose between playing a heroic Autobot or evil Decepticon as both sides vie for control of the legendry Allspark, the source of all Transformer life. Rather than painstakingly explore every facet of the game, I decided to focus on the central theme. Good versus bad...right versus wrong.
What Transformers Does Right
Voices: Even the voices that aren't Peter Cullen and Frank Welker, the original Optimus and Megatron, are done rather well. Shia in particular sounds really into his role, unlike certain video game voiceover actors I could mention (Yes you Tobey), which leads me to...
Human Characters: Rather than going with the standard method of building a character model and painting on a face to represent the movie actors, TT actually created full models for the humans, giving them a slightly exaggerated look at feel that really helps them mesh with the action. It really is an example of how real-world characters should be done in games.
Scale: Travellers Tales has done a pretty amazing job of making you feel like you are a huge freaking robot in a world full of squishy humans. I was also impressed by the accuracy in depicting the carious bots' sizes in relation to each other, though I am sure that is more a product of the movie character specs.
Fan Service: Playing through the Autobot storyline I ran into a character that isn't featured in the film but is probably one of the most menacing characters from the original comic book and cartoon series, completely re-imagined to fit with the design aesthetic. Not going to mention any names, but fans will be in for quite a shock when they see who it is. There could very well be more lurking in there for all I know. Add to that the unlockable concept arts, trailers, and G1 character models and you've almost got to buy this is you're a fan...well, a rabid Transformers fan like myself.
What Transformers Does Wrong
Graphics: While it looks pretty enough in screenshots, playing through the game on the 360 I can't shake the feeling that all of the bloom and lighting effects are covering up some less than stellar graphics.
Encounter Zones: As you roam about the map you enter encounters, some of which are surrounded by green circles that you cannot step outside of for fear of failing the mission. Your enemies can certainly be knocked out of it though, giving you plenty of time to stand around looking bloomy while waiting for them to get back.
Invisible Walls: The game is NOT a free-roaming game if you have invisible walls in it, period. Put the whole thing in an impassable canyon if you'd like, but no stupid invisible walls. It's Optimus Prime, not Optimus Mime.

Driving:
A good driving game gives you the sensation of actually gripping the road as you turn the wheel. Transformers, for the most part, does not. On top of that, cars get knocked away from you far too easily. Bumblebee should not be able to knock a bus off the road without shoulder-checking it.

Missions:
Some of the missions are just plain corny. In one of the Autobot missions I had to travel from waypoint to waypoint, saving Jazz from getting his ass kicked. I'd show up, there'd be a cutscene of ass-kicked Jazz, I'd tell him to run for it and take care of the bad guys. Two miles down the road he's getting his ass handed to him again. Either Jazz sucks, which I refuse to believe, or this wasn't planned all that well.
Camera: See those trees? You're in there somewhere. So is the robot trying to kill you. Pretty snazzy, huh? Even in the open streets the camera isn't all that responsive, making for some really unfortunate deaths on y part.
Checkpoints: There are no checkpoints, despite the fact that missions themselves use a waypoint system that would have been perfect for it. I don't like failing at the last moment during a fifteen minute mission and having to start back over.
Transforming: This is going to sound extremely nitpicky, but why can't I transform into vehicle mode in mid-air? I can change to robot in mid-air, why not the other way around? I don't want to live in a world where I can't jump off the top of the building and turn into a helicopter halfway down.
Til All Are One
So after a quick tallying we have four good things versus eight bad things. Not really a good balance. Even figuring the bonus 20% for just having the name Transformers on the cover and you've still got something just north of completely mediocre. If you're really curious about the game, try giving it a rent, or at least pick it up somewhere used where you can return it just in case. I'd mention that it is a must-have item for rabid fans, but we've already bought it.
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