tell me your best mama joke or any joke
- Thread starter MaartenD
- Start date
forever_reader
New member
- Apr 26, 2008
- 9
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i do =(
Not a yo momma joke.
After years of milking cows with the traditional stool-and-squirt method, Farmer Giles finds he has enough money to order a high-tech milking machine. The equipment arrives a few days later and, realising his wife is out for the day, decides to test the machine on himself first.
After setting it up, he quickly eases his beef bayonet into the equipment and flicks the switch. The sucking teat pleasures him better than his wife ever could, but when it's over the machine will not release his member. In desperation, the farmer calls the Customer Service Hotline. "Hello," he winces, "I've just bought a milking machine from your company. It works fantastic, but, er, how do I remove it from the cow's udder?"
"Don't worry." Replies the rep. "The machine will release automatically once it's collected two gallons."
After years of milking cows with the traditional stool-and-squirt method, Farmer Giles finds he has enough money to order a high-tech milking machine. The equipment arrives a few days later and, realising his wife is out for the day, decides to test the machine on himself first.
After setting it up, he quickly eases his beef bayonet into the equipment and flicks the switch. The sucking teat pleasures him better than his wife ever could, but when it's over the machine will not release his member. In desperation, the farmer calls the Customer Service Hotline. "Hello," he winces, "I've just bought a milking machine from your company. It works fantastic, but, er, how do I remove it from the cow's udder?"
"Don't worry." Replies the rep. "The machine will release automatically once it's collected two gallons."
ZoneatheProfessional
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- Apr 12, 2008
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A man and a women are in a hotel lobby and the man accidently elbows the womens breast. The man says "If your heart is as soft as your breast you'll forgive me" The women says "If you penis is as hard as your elbow im in room 209"
harddrive2002
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- Feb 11, 2008
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yo mommas like a bowling ball she gets picked up, fingered, thrown in the gutter and still comes back for more
ozzymrjack
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- May 21, 2008
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your mom is like a hockey player-she changes her pads every 3 periods
oooooooo:crash:
oooooooo:crash:
doctorspivey
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- Mar 8, 2008
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I might sig this.
whats worse than finding a worm in your apple?
(i dunno)
finding two worms in your apple...whats worse than finding two worms in your apple?
(i dunno)
finding 3 worms in your apple... whats worse than finding 3 worms in your apple?
(i dunno)
...the holocaust.
Whats funnier than a clown?
(i dunno)
two clowns... whats funnier than two clowns?
(i dunno)
three clowns... whats funnier than 3 clowns?
(i dunno)
...The Holocaust.
delete if this is too racist.
(i dunno)
finding two worms in your apple...whats worse than finding two worms in your apple?
(i dunno)
finding 3 worms in your apple... whats worse than finding 3 worms in your apple?
(i dunno)
...the holocaust.
Whats funnier than a clown?
(i dunno)
two clowns... whats funnier than two clowns?
(i dunno)
three clowns... whats funnier than 3 clowns?
(i dunno)
...The Holocaust.
delete if this is too racist.
woahinkian
New member
- Mar 12, 2008
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Why Is The Pool Closed?
Because of Aids
Because of Aids
amkrishna1957
New member
- May 18, 2008
- 7
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- 1
lol i heard that joke before last year but prostitute number 2 said bitch what you talking about i just coughed
one day these three kids are walking through a field when a farmer pulls up and throws them in his truck. he takes them to his barn and yells "you are the kids that destroy my crops, so now your gonna pay".
he goes to the first kid and asks him what his father does for a living, and the kid says he works and a factory makeing pliers. so the farmer grabe a pair of pliers and pulls the kids penis off.
he goes to the second kid and asks him the same question, the kid says that his dad works at the saw factroy, so the farmer saws the kids penis off.
he gets to the third kid, and the kid is laughing his ass off. the farmer asks what is so funny and the kid says, my dad works at the lollipop factory, you have to suck mine off!
he goes to the first kid and asks him what his father does for a living, and the kid says he works and a factory makeing pliers. so the farmer grabe a pair of pliers and pulls the kids penis off.
he goes to the second kid and asks him the same question, the kid says that his dad works at the saw factroy, so the farmer saws the kids penis off.
he gets to the third kid, and the kid is laughing his ass off. the farmer asks what is so funny and the kid says, my dad works at the lollipop factory, you have to suck mine off!
What is worse than 100 babies nailed to a tree?
- 1 Baby nailed to 100 trees.
What is the difference between a Corvette and a pile of dead babies?
- I don't have a Corvette in my garage.
How do you make a baby cry twice?
- Wipe your bloody dick on it's teddy bear.
- 1 Baby nailed to 100 trees.
What is the difference between a Corvette and a pile of dead babies?
- I don't have a Corvette in my garage.
How do you make a baby cry twice?
- Wipe your bloody dick on it's teddy bear.
PrincessDi
New member
- Mar 18, 2008
- 19
- 0
- 1
^ LOl thats FU'd up
A blonde walks into an electronics store and asks the salesman, ''how much is that tv ?'' The sales man tells her that the store does not sell to blondes. So the lady, being clever, dies her hair brown. She walks in the next day and asks a different sales man ''How much is that tv, I would like to buy it'' The salesman said that they do not sell to blondes. So the lady asks ''How in the world did you know that i was a blonde??''. He replies, ''Lady, thats a microwave''.
LULZ0rz
A blonde walks into an electronics store and asks the salesman, ''how much is that tv ?'' The sales man tells her that the store does not sell to blondes. So the lady, being clever, dies her hair brown. She walks in the next day and asks a different sales man ''How much is that tv, I would like to buy it'' The salesman said that they do not sell to blondes. So the lady asks ''How in the world did you know that i was a blonde??''. He replies, ''Lady, thats a microwave''.
LULZ0rz