Smile ..its not hard to

fallen_genius18

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Apr 4, 2008
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Why, Why, Why
do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting dead?

Why do banks charge a fee on 'insufficient funds' when they know there is not enough money?

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle?

Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?

Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Whose idea was it to put an 'S' in the word 'lisp'?

If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?

Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?

Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?

Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?

Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?

Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try?

How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?

When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, 'It's all right?' Well, it isn't all right, so why don't we say, 'That hurt, you stupid idiot?'

Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?

In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?

How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?

And my FAVORITE......
The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four persons is suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends -- if they're okay, then it's you.
 
I guess they're along the same lines as:
"Why do people always say 'Well it's always in the last place you look' when you've lost something?"
 
My three best friends are all crazy...so according to your reasoning...I am a bloody genious.


regards and thanks koyo
 
Why is it when you're looking for something you keep going back to where you thought you'd put it? You've checked 20 times and you still go back when you fail to turn it up elsewhere!

Why is abbreviation such a long word?

Why is dyslexia so damn hard to spell?

Why doesn't phonetic start with an 'F'?

Rob
 
One for all the fitness types:

If winners never quit, and quitters never win, why do we say 'Quit whilst you're ahead'?

Some faves of mine:

If flying is so safe, why is the last place you go to before flying called a ‘terminal’?

And further to that, why is the first thing they teach you to do on a plane is crash?

Why do they make atheists swear on the bible in court?

If money doesn’t grow on trees, why do banks have branches?

If laughter is the best medicine, why do we say ‘I died laughing’?

If we tell kids never to take sweets from strangers, why do we allow trick or treating?

Why don’t Chinese people get English words tattooed on their bodies?

Why do we still have woodpeckers? Wasn’t Noah’s boat made of wood? (think about this one!!)

Why do we put towels in the wash? Aren’t we clean when we use them?

Why do we shout ‘heads up’ when we mean ‘duck’?

Why do pizzas come in square boxes?

If there’s an exception to every rule, what’s the exception to THAT rule?

Why is there a light in the fridge and not the freezer?

Why are there signs to the ‘self-help’ section? (work with me here!)

Why is there an expiration date on sour cream?

Why does mineral water that has ‘filtered through rocks for centuries’ have a use by date?

If practice makes perfect, but nobody’s perfect, why do we bother practising?

Why do we send cargo by ship, but shipments by car?

If the sky is the limit, why do we reach for the stars?

Why does rain drop, but snow falls?



And my personal favourite:



Why can’t I set my laser printer to ‘stun’?
 
LMAO!!!!

Why is it the when you shake a new ketchup bottle, nothing comes out, but you shake one that's almost empty and it gets all over you?!?!?!
 
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