Husband says the dishes are my job?

J

James

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May 13, 2008
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Even though I go to work and pay the bills. While he is an out of work writer. Also just had a baby 4 months ago.went back to work after six days and am newly pregnant again..so he waits for me to do them.when I asked for his help...he said thats womens work!! ugh....... So pist had no clue he thought this way..cause I never bring up housework. I just do whatever needs to be done when I can. But obviously right now between all night feedings and pregnancy and a full timr job im getting tired.and the housework is piling up.what do I say to him...im shocked at what a jerk he is!
 
I do my own dishes and laundry, I cook and clean and hold down a decent job and the deadbeats get the girl. Life sucks.
 
I do my own dishes and laundry, I cook and clean and hold down a decent job and the deadbeats get the girl. Life sucks.
 
raised 4 kids. was a foster mom to newborns right from the hospital, and i was a nanny, babies can sleep all night at 4 months.
so work on that, he or she needs to be on a schedule.
if he's home all day letting you support him how is that so manly?
[if he considers dishes womens work]
you really need to quit, just quit, force the big writer to get out of the house like a man, and do whatever it takes to support his family.
that is a disgrace.
i read about a young mother who was so tired she fell down a flight of stairs and died.
 
raised 4 kids. was a foster mom to newborns right from the hospital, and i was a nanny, babies can sleep all night at 4 months.
so work on that, he or she needs to be on a schedule.
if he's home all day letting you support him how is that so manly?
[if he considers dishes womens work]
you really need to quit, just quit, force the big writer to get out of the house like a man, and do whatever it takes to support his family.
that is a disgrace.
i read about a young mother who was so tired she fell down a flight of stairs and died.
 
If he wants to say that's women's work, he needs to be reminded that according to his view bringing home a paycheck and providing for the family is man's work. He'd better get on it.
 
tell him the only way the legs will ever open is if he volunteers to take on the dishes full time.
 
U oh and you've having another baby with him? He sounds immature and has a lot of growing up to do....it's very sad that you're married to a guy like this and actually have two children with him - put the breaks immediately on to having any more children. Right now look after your children and quite frankly your husband can take care of himself. Although, one would have to ask; does he take care of the baby during the day and get up to baby during the night? Hopefully he's just overtired and not coping due to the demands of looking after baby?
 
whether he thinks that or not is of no concern to you. Tell him you are allocating the dishes as HIS responsibility... since you are doing all that you are doing, and that it is up to him whether he washes them himself, or hires and pays a woman to do them... just to let him know, he'll have to first earn some money of his own before he can pay her.

Put your foot down... you have another sixty odd years of this to go!!!!! Do not set the bar of expectation so low. You will regret it many times over.
 
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