Why are (Asian) parents always complain and are in denial?

[Helloooonurse]

My sister and I feel very grateful for our parents and what they've done (and are doing) for us... although sometimes, now that we're older we feel as though they've spoiled us and it gets annoying when they still do it to us to this day! They would rather do everything for us than to let us be our own individuals, rather restrict us because we lack capabilities YET they "complain" how we're not responsible at all. I finally got into a competitive medical major and it is my first priority. Luckily for me, it is a part time program that is online (that's the hard part). I'm not rushing it but knowing that I can (and is possible) I wanted to apply for a hospital job (that i've been qualified for) that pays well, has good hours (flexible for students) but my parents were UPSET/discouraged me and instead, ENCOURAGED me to just depend on my finances to them... and i don't like it. Maybe bc i'm so americanized and have that need to grow and be independent but I don't like asking them for money knowing I'm an "adult" capable of making my own money. Also, i tend to notice that that asians seem to value responsibility on how much you can cook/clean. I do agree it's not important but that doesn't define you as a "mature" individual. If I have a clinical the next morning, I will prepare for that FIRST bc it's a priority... the clothes can wait and I do eventually get them done. My parents disagree. I see my cousin and classmates (who have moved here from asian countries) and how different they interact outside the house. I don't want to stereotype but it seems as if they lack a certain confidence, self esteem, independence... My classmate is 30 and is so needy and unsure of herself w. her classes, assignments... needs constant reassurance in her decision making, doesn't know how to be assertive in asking her needs and wants... I saw parts of myself in her (from before I decided to change)... it's just clashing of 2 cultures...

I just don't like how my parents always blame my sister and I for being "spoiled" yet to be honest...if they want to complain, they should've looked at how they raised my sister and I. If they wanted clean cooks/maids who are "mature", they should've stopped doing things for us when we were younger. I don't even know why they complain about it when we still attend to our responsibilities....