Questionaire
New member
- Jun 6, 2008
- 26
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I'll try to be as short and sweet as possible. I'm a 23 year old female and I understand that everyone has their own sets of problems/issues. However, I feel like I may have too much baggage.
My "issues" began with your basic trust issues. As the years have passed, they've gotten stronger and it's very difficult for me to meet people, let alone open up to them. I want to open up, to bond, but I can't seem to let myself. I automatically expect someone to be a liar, that I'm not good enough and that they'll leave.. end up either becoming clingy, pushing them away or withdrawing. So I guess, now that I think about it, there are some abandonment issues as well.
I don't want to NEED anyone. I want to be self-suffient and independent. But I'm terrified of ending up alone. Afraid to open up and getting (even more) hurt. And I know you have to open up in order for any type of relationship to exist. The FEW times I've been able to actually start becoming attached to a boyfriend or friend.. I panic and start to question their "motive" and push them away.
I've even tried making online friends/dating thinking the distance would serve as a protective barrier. Only to find myself in heartache there as well.
I want to change these habits that I've had for at least half of my life. I've learned that fellow former classmates of mine are now married with kids and happily settled. I'm the ONLY single, child-less person left. I haven't had (what I consider to be) a real "boyfriend" since I was 16 and I feel like a loser.
Ideally, you want your partner to be both your best friend and your lover. Relationships are based on communication and trust and consist of constant give and take. I'm not unreasonable. I just want to be treated the way I'd treat them. With love and respect. But, honestly, I don't think I'll ever get close to having one. Do you think I'll ever meet someone? What's the best way, in your opinion, to meet other singles? I'm through with the online match making.
My "issues" began with your basic trust issues. As the years have passed, they've gotten stronger and it's very difficult for me to meet people, let alone open up to them. I want to open up, to bond, but I can't seem to let myself. I automatically expect someone to be a liar, that I'm not good enough and that they'll leave.. end up either becoming clingy, pushing them away or withdrawing. So I guess, now that I think about it, there are some abandonment issues as well.
I don't want to NEED anyone. I want to be self-suffient and independent. But I'm terrified of ending up alone. Afraid to open up and getting (even more) hurt. And I know you have to open up in order for any type of relationship to exist. The FEW times I've been able to actually start becoming attached to a boyfriend or friend.. I panic and start to question their "motive" and push them away.
I've even tried making online friends/dating thinking the distance would serve as a protective barrier. Only to find myself in heartache there as well.
I want to change these habits that I've had for at least half of my life. I've learned that fellow former classmates of mine are now married with kids and happily settled. I'm the ONLY single, child-less person left. I haven't had (what I consider to be) a real "boyfriend" since I was 16 and I feel like a loser.
Ideally, you want your partner to be both your best friend and your lover. Relationships are based on communication and trust and consist of constant give and take. I'm not unreasonable. I just want to be treated the way I'd treat them. With love and respect. But, honestly, I don't think I'll ever get close to having one. Do you think I'll ever meet someone? What's the best way, in your opinion, to meet other singles? I'm through with the online match making.