ProfessorPee
New member
- Jan 1, 2009
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I am dating a woman that I am very fond of. We are both in our 40's and therefore, I understand that we will have our issues and baggage. I see issues and baggage to be things that interferes with life because one has not yet dealt with it. So, I will not say that this woman's sex addiction is an issue or baggage because she has dealt with it and has been in recovery for 10 years.
PROBLEM? IM ignorant to what "RECOVERY" really means.
She informed me that she is a "Biological Sex Addict" in that she learned to masturbate at the age of four (4) and did so every day through her childhood. In doing so, her brain was conditioned to experience a "high" 10 times more powerful than heroine. Hence, I understand how one could become addicted to the orgasm. I also understand that this type of addict does not need to cheat or even be with another human to feed their addiction since the high is in the orgasm and can be achieved through masturbation. However, I am concerned about our future because I do not know what RECOVERY really means.
The research Ive done online says that an addict cannot be cured, but can be in recovery meaning that they live healthy lives with healthy relationships because they have taken control of the addiction, but still, I want to understand more.
Also, it seems like "sex addict" is another word for "CHEATER". Is this true? She says she has never cheat in her life and her life reflects that of one who lives with lots of integrity and discipline.
WHAT IS RECOVERY?
SHE WILL NOT HAVE SEX WITH ME unless we are in a committed relationship. She wont allow herself to get aroused with me until we know each other much better, with love and commitment being the ultimate goal. She said that when we do have sex, it will be taken slowly, and not just go for it right away, meaning that we'll explore oral sex long before intercourse. Im cool with that. She says its all tied into her recovery and the use of her tools so that she can be in control and not relapse. Whats all this about?
Oh, one more thing. Based on what Ive read about the HIGH they experience and what shes told me, I think Im in for quite a different sexual experience with her. She said that when she has sex, its like a Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde experience in that she changes completely, becomes primal, and the high is so strong before, during and after orgasm that she cant just get up and leave or fall asleep but rather, the sex act lasts a long time, (always hours), and her lover will feel completely enveloped, loved and eventually become addicted to her orgasm as well. Hence, she wishes to share this with ONLY the man she falls in love with and is committed to. Is this normal? (Casual sex is not an option with her.)
Can anyone shed some light on this for me?
Whats recovery? Can we have a healthy relationship with her being in recovery for 10 years?
Is she telling the truth when she says she chooses to love first so that she wont confuse the high from our sex with love?
HELP!!!
PROBLEM? IM ignorant to what "RECOVERY" really means.
She informed me that she is a "Biological Sex Addict" in that she learned to masturbate at the age of four (4) and did so every day through her childhood. In doing so, her brain was conditioned to experience a "high" 10 times more powerful than heroine. Hence, I understand how one could become addicted to the orgasm. I also understand that this type of addict does not need to cheat or even be with another human to feed their addiction since the high is in the orgasm and can be achieved through masturbation. However, I am concerned about our future because I do not know what RECOVERY really means.
The research Ive done online says that an addict cannot be cured, but can be in recovery meaning that they live healthy lives with healthy relationships because they have taken control of the addiction, but still, I want to understand more.
Also, it seems like "sex addict" is another word for "CHEATER". Is this true? She says she has never cheat in her life and her life reflects that of one who lives with lots of integrity and discipline.
WHAT IS RECOVERY?
SHE WILL NOT HAVE SEX WITH ME unless we are in a committed relationship. She wont allow herself to get aroused with me until we know each other much better, with love and commitment being the ultimate goal. She said that when we do have sex, it will be taken slowly, and not just go for it right away, meaning that we'll explore oral sex long before intercourse. Im cool with that. She says its all tied into her recovery and the use of her tools so that she can be in control and not relapse. Whats all this about?
Oh, one more thing. Based on what Ive read about the HIGH they experience and what shes told me, I think Im in for quite a different sexual experience with her. She said that when she has sex, its like a Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde experience in that she changes completely, becomes primal, and the high is so strong before, during and after orgasm that she cant just get up and leave or fall asleep but rather, the sex act lasts a long time, (always hours), and her lover will feel completely enveloped, loved and eventually become addicted to her orgasm as well. Hence, she wishes to share this with ONLY the man she falls in love with and is committed to. Is this normal? (Casual sex is not an option with her.)
Can anyone shed some light on this for me?
Whats recovery? Can we have a healthy relationship with her being in recovery for 10 years?
Is she telling the truth when she says she chooses to love first so that she wont confuse the high from our sex with love?
HELP!!!