MeHardyFan#1WWERockstt
Member
- Mar 5, 2008
- 30
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Pertaining to physical involvement between two people, what constitutes one being used by the other?
I am of the premature and underdeveloped opinion that a relationship that plays out like the "Little Red Hen" story is not a relationship at all, but one person using the other sexually.
For those who don't know the story, the little red hen decides one day to bake some bread. She's gathering up flour and yeast and all the ingredients. She asks the dog if he wants to help carry the flour, but he declines. Asks the duck if he wants to help knead the dough, but he declines. Basically, nobody wants to help make the bread. However, when the bread is finished and comes out of the oven hot and fresh, everybody is more than eager to eat it.
Going on that same thought, of wanting to reap goods without putting anything into them, I think that if someone wants to get physically involved with another person, but refuses to get into a committed relationship with them, they are using that person. Keep in mind, this is NOT a question of whether it is right, or wrong, or natural to use someone for physical pleasure. I'm just trying to get at the act itself, and what constitutes it.
If I want to get involved with someone, "no strings attached", take it to a physical level and yet not committ myself to that person, am I using them? It seems that in doing so I am reducing this person to a means to my selfish ends, pleasure, and not treating them as an end themselves. If anything were to be called usage, surely this would be it, no?
Perhaps I could hear your thoughts on relationships, committment, usage, the intricacies of physical involvement without committing oneself to another, etc.?
I am of the premature and underdeveloped opinion that a relationship that plays out like the "Little Red Hen" story is not a relationship at all, but one person using the other sexually.
For those who don't know the story, the little red hen decides one day to bake some bread. She's gathering up flour and yeast and all the ingredients. She asks the dog if he wants to help carry the flour, but he declines. Asks the duck if he wants to help knead the dough, but he declines. Basically, nobody wants to help make the bread. However, when the bread is finished and comes out of the oven hot and fresh, everybody is more than eager to eat it.
Going on that same thought, of wanting to reap goods without putting anything into them, I think that if someone wants to get physically involved with another person, but refuses to get into a committed relationship with them, they are using that person. Keep in mind, this is NOT a question of whether it is right, or wrong, or natural to use someone for physical pleasure. I'm just trying to get at the act itself, and what constitutes it.
If I want to get involved with someone, "no strings attached", take it to a physical level and yet not committ myself to that person, am I using them? It seems that in doing so I am reducing this person to a means to my selfish ends, pleasure, and not treating them as an end themselves. If anything were to be called usage, surely this would be it, no?
Perhaps I could hear your thoughts on relationships, committment, usage, the intricacies of physical involvement without committing oneself to another, etc.?