San Francisco: Avoiding Bastille Day in San Francisco

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In 1789, French Revolutionaries stormed the Bastille to start the French Revolution, which is now celebrated by drunken Americans worldwide. Perhaps you'd care to join them in San Francisco? For those who enjoy gently mocking unbridled ethno-patriotic revelry (like St. Patrick's Day and Cinco De Mayo), here's an anti-French survival guide for the most upscale holiday we have.
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