to go running back. Why am I doing this? I've been in love with him since I was a little girl.. we got engaged years later, and i'd never been happier. That is until I found out he'd been cheating on me with girls online. After reading the dirty convos he'd been having with these girls, and the dirty pics he'd been looking at from them, I left him. He begged me to forgive him, he even went to the point where he'd show up at my door crying or leaving endless letters about how sorry he was. None of that worked. I ended all communication with him, but I never stopped loving him and my heart ache never seized. Then 3 months after our break-up, I get a phone call from him crying and telling me how sorry he is and how he'd realized during this time what he lost, that he loves me so much, and that he's changed and will do anything to prove his sincerity. I agreed to see him after this to talk this out.. we ended up seeing each other quite a few times, but each time we'd just end up making out and feeling each other up. I don't know why or how I could have gave in that easily, I feel so dissapointed and ashamed in myself.. I laughed and talked with him so lovingly, that I gave this impression that i'd forgiven him and have fully healed from the pain he's caused me.. I never realize how stupid i'm being until after I leave him, and think back on my actions. I don't know why i'm doing this, I don't know what to do.. i'm afraid that if I don't end up going back to him, he'll say I played him for going back then turning around and changing my mind. Please someone help me 
And please don't be judgemental.. keep in mind that I really love this guy.. thank you everyone
And please don't be judgemental.. keep in mind that I really love this guy.. thank you everyone