bubblewrap08
New member
- Mar 21, 2009
- 3
- 0
- 1
Just enjoy...
and don't forget to star if you laughed...
15 questions (R rated)
1) Which sexual position produces the ugliest children? Ask your mother.
2) How do you embarrass an archeologist? Give him a tampon and ask him which period it came from.
3) What's the difference between a bitch and a whore? A whore sleeps with everybody at the party A bitch sleeps with everybody at the party except you.
4) What's the difference between love, true love, and showing off? Spitting, swallowing, and gargling.
5) What's the difference between a Catholic wife and a Jewish wife? A Catholic wife has real orgasms and fake jewelry.
6) What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying? The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.
7) What is the biggest problem for an atheist? No one to talk to during orgasm.
8) What do you call an Amish guy with his hand up a horse's ass? A mechanic.
9) Who is the most popular guy at the nudist colony? The guy who can carry a cup of coffee in each hand and a dozen donuts.
10) Who is the most popular girl at the nudist colony? The one who can eat the last donut.
11) Jewish dilemma: Free PORK.
12) The three words men hate to hear most during sex: "Are you in?"
13) The three words women hate to hear most during sex: "Honey, I'm home!"
14) Why do men take showers instead of baths? Pissing in the bath is disgusting.
15) Do you know why they call it the Wonder Bra? When she takes it off, you wonder where her tits went
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Random Funny (PG - 13)
We had gay burgalars once. They broke in and rearranged the furniture.
A friend will call you in Jail. A good friend will visit you in Jail. A best friend will be sitting next to you in Jail saying..."THAT WAS AWESOME!"
Blue whales can produce over 400 gallons of sperm in one ejaculation. Only 10% of that makes it to the mate. That means that 360 gallons of sperm are let into the ocean every time a whale ejaculates. Try not to swallow to much ocean water... and maybe females should refrain from swimming... I wonder if they can get pregnant with whale babies??
Me no here. Me go bye. Leave me message. Me reply. Leave good message. Me reply fast. But if me no like you, kiss my ass.
A B C D E F G, Gummie Bears are after me!!!! One is Red, one is Blue, a Yellow one just stole my shoe!
There are three kinds of people in the world... those who can count, and those who can't.
Only in America do they leave the doors of the bank open, but chain the pens to the desk.
My whipped iced dairy drink brings the attentions of many males to my place of residence and/or employment, and they declare that its quality far surpasses that of yours. Absolutely, it far surpasses yours. I could convey to you the proverbial recipe, but I would have to demand compensation.
Why is a carrot more orange than an orange?
Can you grow birds by planting birdseed?
One time I tried to drown my fish... It didn't work too well.
If you are the cable company, I already sent the money. If you are my family, please give me money. If you are my employer, you didn't pay me enough money. If you are my friends, you owe me money. If you are a female, don't worry, I have plenty of money.
Dashing through the snow, in a pair of broken skis, screaming as I go, ramming into trees,(boomboomboom) snow is turning red, I think I'm almost dead, someone call an ambulance, 'cause I need a hospital bed. Oh, Jingle bells...
Sorry, but I'm away right now. Please leave your name, phone number, where you live, where you hide your money, and the times in which you're not home, and I'll get right back to you.
My doctor is so stupid. He says that I have a condition called ADD. He told me that it stood for Attention Def- Hey look! A butterfly!
Last night, when I was camping, I was looking up at the stars wondering... WHERE THE HECK IS MY CEILING???
Silence is golden. Duct tape is silver.
I am currently alphabetizing my M&M's. Can you tell me what letter to start with?
My keyboard is racist. It has a +, but no Star of David key.
Booty Shakin* Heart Brakin* Madd Hott* Never stop* Short Skirt* Luv 2 flirt* Tyte Jeans* Curvy Hips* Glossed Lips* High Class* Nice Ass* Bangin Style* Sexy Smile* Luscious Thighs* Candy Eyes* Temptin Lips* KilLa Kiss* Tell me can u handle this?
Searching for friends on EBay!
Downloading life... 30%...60%...90%...Complete. Downloading good looks... 0%....0%....0%....0%... - Geek reality
Remember, when someone annoys you, it takes 42 muscles to frown, BUT, only takes 4 muscles to bitch-slap that little fuck upside the head.
Beer, Drugs, Rock n Roll - Speed, Weed, Birth Control - Life's a bitch and then
and don't forget to star if you laughed...
15 questions (R rated)
1) Which sexual position produces the ugliest children? Ask your mother.
2) How do you embarrass an archeologist? Give him a tampon and ask him which period it came from.
3) What's the difference between a bitch and a whore? A whore sleeps with everybody at the party A bitch sleeps with everybody at the party except you.
4) What's the difference between love, true love, and showing off? Spitting, swallowing, and gargling.
5) What's the difference between a Catholic wife and a Jewish wife? A Catholic wife has real orgasms and fake jewelry.
6) What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying? The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.
7) What is the biggest problem for an atheist? No one to talk to during orgasm.
8) What do you call an Amish guy with his hand up a horse's ass? A mechanic.
9) Who is the most popular guy at the nudist colony? The guy who can carry a cup of coffee in each hand and a dozen donuts.
10) Who is the most popular girl at the nudist colony? The one who can eat the last donut.
11) Jewish dilemma: Free PORK.
12) The three words men hate to hear most during sex: "Are you in?"
13) The three words women hate to hear most during sex: "Honey, I'm home!"
14) Why do men take showers instead of baths? Pissing in the bath is disgusting.
15) Do you know why they call it the Wonder Bra? When she takes it off, you wonder where her tits went
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Random Funny (PG - 13)
We had gay burgalars once. They broke in and rearranged the furniture.
A friend will call you in Jail. A good friend will visit you in Jail. A best friend will be sitting next to you in Jail saying..."THAT WAS AWESOME!"
Blue whales can produce over 400 gallons of sperm in one ejaculation. Only 10% of that makes it to the mate. That means that 360 gallons of sperm are let into the ocean every time a whale ejaculates. Try not to swallow to much ocean water... and maybe females should refrain from swimming... I wonder if they can get pregnant with whale babies??
Me no here. Me go bye. Leave me message. Me reply. Leave good message. Me reply fast. But if me no like you, kiss my ass.
A B C D E F G, Gummie Bears are after me!!!! One is Red, one is Blue, a Yellow one just stole my shoe!
There are three kinds of people in the world... those who can count, and those who can't.
Only in America do they leave the doors of the bank open, but chain the pens to the desk.
My whipped iced dairy drink brings the attentions of many males to my place of residence and/or employment, and they declare that its quality far surpasses that of yours. Absolutely, it far surpasses yours. I could convey to you the proverbial recipe, but I would have to demand compensation.
Why is a carrot more orange than an orange?
Can you grow birds by planting birdseed?
One time I tried to drown my fish... It didn't work too well.
If you are the cable company, I already sent the money. If you are my family, please give me money. If you are my employer, you didn't pay me enough money. If you are my friends, you owe me money. If you are a female, don't worry, I have plenty of money.
Dashing through the snow, in a pair of broken skis, screaming as I go, ramming into trees,(boomboomboom) snow is turning red, I think I'm almost dead, someone call an ambulance, 'cause I need a hospital bed. Oh, Jingle bells...
Sorry, but I'm away right now. Please leave your name, phone number, where you live, where you hide your money, and the times in which you're not home, and I'll get right back to you.
My doctor is so stupid. He says that I have a condition called ADD. He told me that it stood for Attention Def- Hey look! A butterfly!
Last night, when I was camping, I was looking up at the stars wondering... WHERE THE HECK IS MY CEILING???
Silence is golden. Duct tape is silver.
I am currently alphabetizing my M&M's. Can you tell me what letter to start with?
My keyboard is racist. It has a +, but no Star of David key.
Booty Shakin* Heart Brakin* Madd Hott* Never stop* Short Skirt* Luv 2 flirt* Tyte Jeans* Curvy Hips* Glossed Lips* High Class* Nice Ass* Bangin Style* Sexy Smile* Luscious Thighs* Candy Eyes* Temptin Lips* KilLa Kiss* Tell me can u handle this?
Searching for friends on EBay!
Downloading life... 30%...60%...90%...Complete. Downloading good looks... 0%....0%....0%....0%... - Geek reality
Remember, when someone annoys you, it takes 42 muscles to frown, BUT, only takes 4 muscles to bitch-slap that little fuck upside the head.
Beer, Drugs, Rock n Roll - Speed, Weed, Birth Control - Life's a bitch and then