Weddings = million dollar Hollywood production?

You are 100% right. i've talked it over with my girlfriend and if we do get married, we're not gonna have a big fancy wedding, just something small, because we want either our house or apartment to be nice and furnished by the time we move in after we get married.

I have to disagree with you a little bit.

Weddings cost alot because you tend to invite alot of people and long-distance family will tend to make an extra effort to attend. Its not like they would make that extra effort to come to your birthday BBQ, a wedding is different (as you noted "its a big day").

I'm not saying you have to spend a million bucks, but how much do you spend for a nice dinner out with your Fiance including drinks and appetizers? Now multiply that times 100 people (or more) and you can understand why weddings are so costly.

And another thing about your down-payment argument - - - - I already have a house, my fiance already has a house. We don't need another one so what do you think could be a better way for us to spend our money besides how we choose? I don't disagree that people starting out who don't own a place should blow $30-grand on their wedding but sometimes people are in a position in life to be able to spend a little more on their wedding and its very judgemental of you to think of ways you feel that money could be better spent. You don't know everyone's circumstance.

Funny you mention the down payment option. My now wife and I, after her parents gave us the choice of using money left by her grandfather for a wedding or a down payment on a house, we used it for a down payment on a house. Why use the money for what may be just a big party that most will confuse with other weddings when you can use it to find a home and start your lives together?