why does my 8 week old breast fed preemie scream bloody murder when I change

[daisydoodahbbk]

his diaper? All I have to do is lay him down and go for the snaps and he goes hysterical! I've try to make sure that my hands are warm, gave him a passifier, sing to him, bring his little hands together at his chest, talk calmly to him, warm wipies...I'm at my wits end, especially with all the night changings. My husband is a light sleeper and between him screaming at me accusing me of being a terrible mother and the baby screaming and lack of sleep on my part....Somebody please help!!

[CassieC]

check if he has a rash or a sensitive area then if it keeps coming try to go to many pediatricians. it could be an infection causing him pain maybe. i hope the baby is ok.

[KatieC]

I really hope your husband doesn't accuse you of being a terrible mother. If so, you need to think about that. It's not supposed to be that way. By what you have written, I can tell you're a great mother, and you deserve better.
My son is a breastfed preemie also. He hated diaper changes and would go through spurts of being fine, or screaming during changes. Something I noticed my mom doing with him, was she was very calm and changed him slowly and sweetly....which to be honest drove me a little crazy, because I'm all about efficiency and I'm impatient. But, he never cries when she changes him. I think he sensed the calm in her voice and actions. When I change him, especially at night, I'm in this big hurry and stressed because he's crying. Maybe try taking some deep breaths and try to enjoy the time with your son. Just something else to try.
And on a side note, consider using cloth diapers....they're wonderful and fun and so soft on your baby's skin.

[elainevdb]

Oh, my son was the same way... it stopped around 6 weeks (since your son is a preemie, it may take a little while before he stops). My son just didn't like the cold air hitting his wee wee. A lot of babies don't like having their diapers changed. It'll stop in time.

Your husband, on the other hand, needs an attitude adjustment. Babies can feel stress, and this can cause them to cry more. Obviously, there's a lot of tension between you and your husband, and even if you talk calmly to your baby, your 'body' and emotions are 'tense' - that's what he's feeling.

When your husband does that again, kick him out of the room. Or ask him if he can do a better job. I mean... my goodness. My husband's a piece of work, but he's never, ever called me a bad mother. I can't even give you any advice on that.

Talk to him about it, as calmly as possible, and tell him it's not your fault the baby's crying. Babies cry, they need to adjust to a very scary, new world - and a lot of newborns don't like being naked. Colicky babies cry non-stop for months on end... that doesn't make their mommies bad mothers, now does it?

Perhaps, he should sleep in a different room for a while. My husband slept in the spare room for a few months after our son was born, because he couldn't handle the crying baby, and he (hubby), just got on my nerves with his complaining and not helping at all. That worked for us - if you think it may work for you, then give it a try.

Good luck sweetie, it does get better. Remember your husband also needs to adjust - but he should really try to do so quietly, without being so nasty to you.

[»Spence'sMommy«]

my son hated to be naked at that age. around 3 months he started to tolerate it and then a few months later he started to love bath time and diaper changes. now he will crawl away as fast as he can as soon as we get his bum clean.
its just one of those things that you have to go through. it will get better.

[Aashiq_Al_Rasul]

I can't help you with the screaming baby, but I just wanted to say that I feel really sorry for you and hope that you find the solution soon. Good luck

[tinyhippie2]

my 7 week old preemie daughter does the same thing.. i think its that they dont like being cold she is fine once we put the diaper back on ( a new one)

[favorites831]

if your husband is screaming at you accusing you of being a horrible mother then you need a new husband....he is an asshole...i am sure the baby is hearing his stress and screams also...JESUS.....i do not know abut preemies ...ask a preemie doctor...good luck...get rid of husband he will just get worse with the verbal abuse

[tnxmami]

Oh my...my son did the same thing! He also cried at bathtime. I determined it was because he didn't like the feeling of being cold. It seems you are doing everything right with the wipe warmer, pacifier, etc. One thing that my daycare does is hang a mobile over the changing table so the babies have something that distracts them. Maybe play some music and dance around with him before you lay him down since he seems to know that a diaper change is coming. Maybe try changing the location of where you change him? I don't know either! Good luck and you are doing great....!