my husband won't pick up after himself & gets mad when asked to what should I do?

We don't have any kids, but when my husband did that... well, I knew he was a slob when I married him, but didn't like being taken advantage of either. So I just left it where ever he put it down. When he needed clean clothes, he did his own laundry. It got so bad in the house he got embarassed when friends came over because you could tell it was all his stuff. So he cleaned up after himself after that. Then we moved to a newer place, a really nice place, and he's much better at keeping the place clean. It's just his den that's a mess, not as bad as he used to be, but he tries. I now do all the laundry... if it's in the hamper, so now he really makes an attempt to put his clothes in there. You just need to talk with your husband and tell him that you may be home all day long but that doesn't mean you're sitting on the sofa eating bon-bons all day either. Ask him to stay with the kids for a full day while you go out shopping, and he has to cook, clean, keep the kids happy and occupied. Then see what he says. If you were an RN, they make good money, you might consider going back to work and just hire a maid. But the main thing is to talk and communicate with your husband. He might work away from you, but you work at home. Or don't have dinner made one day, tell him you were too busy cleaning up after him. LOL Just talk to him. He has to be more responsible than what he is right now. He should help you out as much as he can. He needs to spend time with the kids when he gets home to give you a break.

Tell him if he had put it in the hamper maybe you won't have to ask him. But i guess that won't work. Maybe you should take a vacation and leave the house and kids to him. Maybe then he will feel just how tiring it is to stay home, take care of the kids and clean the house.

the first day you met him and the first day you started living together is where this problem begin. You set the stage on those two day ones. Would you like to trade those issues and concerns in for some different ones? because a lot of women have some issues they would be glad to trade with you.

you may not want him to resent you but you will or do resent him. you need to stop picking up behind him leave his stuff where he leaves it. i know that it will bother you to see your house in a mess but you have to show him that his involvement in the cleaning of this house is needed and if he doesnt contribute that the house will look like a wreck. clean up after the kids to a point but teach and show them how to clean up after themselves so that wont be like their dad. GodBless

I can understand your position on this one. I am a stay at home mom as of the last two weeks. Prior to that, I worked full-time, just as he did. I understand that I am expected to keep the house in order since that is what I stay at home to do, but I, also, don't expect to be a maid. My husband gets lazy with picking up behind himself, but he corrects the issue if I mention it. So, I don't quite have that problem. All I can say is talk to him. I know I have that mentality. I refuse to clean up behind any grown person.

Yes been there don that married for over 21 years now it takes alot of training to get men to do what you want. When he leaves stuff in the floor put it in his way so he will trip over it.
Tell him you love him and it would help alot if he would pick his stuff up cause the kids watch and if he don't pick up why should they?
Hope this helps
Deana

Well, maybe you should give it one more try, you know talking to him and telling him how you feel. Let him stay one day just one with the kids and have him watch them. Get home and do not pick up after your self and ask him how he feels. You could also not pick up after him for a day or two and show him the mess that he leaves and then explain to him that you are his wife and that you love him but he did not marry a maid. Hopefully I was of some help, my husband does nothing at all around the house and I have just given up on that, I only have one baby though and go to school part time. If my husband even helped me the dishes I would feel weird. I think most men are the same so do not feel sooo bad!

OH MY GOD!!!! I thought it 2 be inevitable...i hate 2 say, but welcome to the wacky world of wifehood!!!! Honestly, I don't think they get it. They only seem to think that just bcuz ur @ home you don't REALLY have anything 2 do!! But trying 2 keep a house clean and having 2 young toddlers @ home is a job all in it's self. I just had to ask my husband 2 put his clothes in the dirty clothes baskets and not on top of the washer just an hour ago, but of course I ended up doing it 4 him...I'M TIRED AND FED UP!!!! So from now on I'll act just like him and leave my things in annoying places and step out of clothes in the middle of the floor and see what type of reaction I get 4rm him. And when he says something I will then point out the fact that it doesn't bother him when he does it and see what he has 2 say then!!!!!!! (yes! it may seem 2 be childish, but you would also expect 2 have 2 keep reminding a child 2 pickup after themselves not ur HUSBAND!!!!!!!!!!!!!) I have also had 2 remind my husband that I'm his wife not his maid...

just try to be pateint with him put more wast baskets around the house..? So he will maybe try,