There are two guys at a golf course. They invite this other guy to play or else he will be alone. So a couple of holes into the game one guy askes the stranger. "So what do u do for a living?", I'm a hit man. REALLY, they ask excitedly, i dont beleive it. Check my bag,he says cooly. So they rush over to his golf caddy and look inside, sure enough there is a huge sniper. Wow, they say as they take it out. Can we have a look? Sure, the stranger replies. Cool, i bet i can see my house from here, he look theres my wife, wait a minute, why is she nude, and theres my neighbor, hes nude as well. How much for a hit, he askes. 1000 $ each time i pull the trigger. Well i want two hits, i want you to shot my wife in the mouth cuz shes always telling me what to do, and i want you to shoot my neighbor in the noodle for screwing with my wife. Ok, the man says as he pickes up his rife and takes aim.

After about five minutes the man askes, whats taking so long, im about to save you 1000 bucks.
funny part:

dudes gettin a blow jobs, one bullet, two targets, one hit, lol