Could this woman harm her son, the way she holds him?

G

Galen7

Guest
My wife and I are quite concerned about a family friend, a young woman who has a son, age 6. She holds the boy on her lap a lot, which is great. But we're worried that she could injure him, with the way she holds him.

She always holds him on her lap with her hands pulled in on his stomach extremely tight. It's no illusion, we've both seen it countless times. She holds him incredibly tight, with her hands sunk back into the soft of his stomach a good two inches deep.

The boy seems perfectly at ease and contented. But it can't be good for him to have his stomach squeezed in so extremely tight. She's not just holding him a little snug, she's holding him as if she's squeezing him in two, pulling her hands back into his stomach all the way to his spine!

Often he will just sit there getting held like this. Or he likes to play a game where he tries to get up off her lap, but she won't let him go, and then afterwards his stomach is kept held back in visibly deeper than before. He really likes this game, and it usually ends after a few rounds when she is holding his stomach in so ultra-intensely tight that he can no longer even wiggle. Then she will keep on holding him this way, so tight that it couldn't possibly get any tighter.

Couldn't she be damaging his internal organs? Even if the boy likes getting held so tight, couldn't it be dangerous? My wife and I are so concerned, we've thought of talking to this woman about the way she holds her son, before she squeezes him into some unforeseen injury.
 
Is really none of your business how a mother decides to hold the child she gave birth to.. if she choose to hold his stomach in so extremly tight that it cannot possibly go back in anytighter, that is HER decision....so just let it be and back off.
 
i've seen the same way of holding a kid but i dont think the boy will be harmed
 
The mother obviously doesn't mean the child any harm. I suspect he's a constant wriggler, and has learned how much activity he'll be allowed by how tightly his mom is holding his stomach in. The more he wriggles around, the tighter he'll get held. Keep it up and he'll find his stomach cinched back in so hard that he won't be able to move at all any more.

You say the boy doesn't seem to be upset by this behavior; indeed, he sees it as some sort of a game. But it's hard to know if the boy is bothered by it or not. I can't imagine it would be easy for him to talk or breathe while being held like that. And would he dare to complain knowing that could lead to finding his middle suddenly wrenched even farther in?

This is what I would do: you need to ask the boy about it when he's alone. "Hey buddy, that game where your mom holds your stomach in real tight when you sit on her lap? Does that bother or hurt you sometimes? She looks like she's holding you pretty tight there!" Then depending on his response you will be able to guage the situation better.

If the child says it's all OK and he likes it, the best thing to do is just let this alone. I know it must look alarming when she holds him with his stomach squeezed in so extremely tight, but our internal organs have a fair amount of wiggle room -- as evidenced by the corsets women used to wear.

Samantha
 
There is no reason for you to be concerned.

As a mother of two i would be curious to know what motivates this mom to hold the boy with her hands pulling his stomach in so incredibly tight. I mean its out of the ordinary something we dont see. Did he ask for it? or is it just how she calms him and holds him still? But theres nothing to be concerned about so I wouldn't question her.
 
I think if she was causing any physical harm the boy would complain but, I'm a bit more concerned about the psychological harm that might be happening.

What are the long term effects of her holding his stomach in so tight? Although, as you mentioned, he does not seem to be in any discomfort I can reassure you that this is not healthy for a 6 year old who is still developing emotionally and mentally. It could lead to abnormal urges or a life long desire to have his stomach caved in extremely tight.

Nonetheless, I would be careful about what you say to the mother. If you suggest she is doing anything wrong she will probably take offense. So maybe you'll just want to leave well enough alone.
 
Who knows. That sounds so strange. Perhaps she holds his stomach in so extremely tight to control him from not getting off of her lap. If he's unable to get off her lap he can't run around the place causing mischief.
 
Or imagine if this mom was already squeezing the boys stomach in so tight that he couldn't even wiggle anymore, and then he was trying to get words to come out and all of a sudden it got even tighter, and then he tugged at her hands and suddenly it got tighter yet, and then he made a noise so then she was pulling her hands back in even harder yet.....You can see that before long she could be wrenching this boy's stomach in TIGHTER THAN HELL!!

I mean just think how freakin TIGHT she'd have to be wrenching her hands back into his stomach already, if he can't even wiggle! And think for a moment how it must FEEL to get his stomach held in that tight!!! And then if he still won't behave and she keeps on pulling his stomach in tighter and tighter and even TIGHTER yet, until it gets just TIGHTER THAN HELL!!!

And it sound like she often does just that and he's just find with it so you gotta wonder.......
 
Most likely the boy has issues, and for some reason or other he needs to be held on her lap with his stomach held in super tight like that.
 
Galen7 said:
My wife and I are quite concerned about a family friend, a young woman who has a son, age 6. She holds the boy on her lap a lot, which is great. But we're worried that she could injure him, with the way she holds him.

She always holds him on her lap with her hands pulled in on his stomach extremely tight. It's no illusion, we've both seen it countless times. She holds him incredibly tight, with her hands sunk back into the soft of his stomach a good two inches deep.

The boy seems perfectly at ease and contented. But it can't be good for him to have his stomach squeezed in so extremely tight. She's not just holding him a little snug, she's holding him as if she's squeezing him in two, pulling her hands back into his stomach all the way to his spine!

Often he will just sit there getting held like this. Or he likes to play a game where he tries to get up off her lap, but she won't let him go, and then afterwards his stomach is kept held back in visibly deeper than before. He really likes this game, and it usually ends after a few rounds when she is holding his stomach in so ultra-intensely tight that he can no longer even wiggle. Then she will keep on holding him this way, so tight that it couldn't possibly get any tighter.

Couldn't she be damaging his internal organs? Even if the boy likes getting held so tight, couldn't it be dangerous? My wife and I are so concerned, we've thought of talking to this woman about the way she holds her son, before she squeezes him into some unforeseen injury.
Click to expand...

Not sure.. Sounds a bit perverted though
 
It sounds to me like the boy's mother holds his stomach in super mega tight because he asked her to. I don't know why he'd ask to be held so tight but there is nothing wrong with that.

And then she found she can hold his stomach in ULTRA super mega tight to make him behave and hold him still. It doesn't sound like she's hurting him, it sounds like he likes it. He's just doing weird kid stuff and it works for her. Nothing wrong with that.

gamerchick
 
erm that sounds...odd..The boy's mother might think that holding his stomach in so extremly tight might be the best way to keep him happy but that sounds too strange It sounds more to me that this is more HER thing than his. We all have odd little things we like, this one has to be one of hers.

May be, she was semi-molested this way herself in the past and now she keeps doing the same :))) Serisously, I think she might enjoy it, so held her boy super tight once. He doesn't protest as I understand, and she enjoyed doing it to him, so she keeps on doing it.

As long as it's just her own son and he doesn't seem distressed, I'd keep my nose out of her business...but, I'd beware of letting her babysit someone else's child or even hold another child on her lap. Because I suspect soon she'd have her hands pulled several inches deep into that child's stomach too.....
 
Omg. What kind of society do we live in. Is it not possible to be caring and calming to a child anymore without getting accused for doing something sexual and/or damaging?

When she is sitting holding her child in her lap it's easier to hold the boy's stomach in vise-tight to give that calming effect. Or else her "stomach-vise" will keep getting tighter and tighter until he is calmed. So he being used to this way of calming down conditioned his brain that is was comforting to him. So now he internalize it and is comforted by how tight she is squeezing him.

I guess the next generation will complain about family who never touched them, because they were afraid of being accused for something wrong.
 
You might find the answer you're looking for by simply asking the mother why she holds her son with his stomach constricted in so extremely tight. Keep it light-hearted and joking: "Say, that's quite the magic trick, how did you make his stomach disappear? It's like abracadabra, his entire midsection is missing! It looks like there's nothing there, like he has no stomach at all!" To the boy: "Did your mom go abracadabra, a boy with no stomach? Did she magically erase your stomach? Do you like being a boy with no stomach? How does that feel?"

She clearly has no reservations about holding the boy's stomach in so tightly right out in front of people. It is peculiar, so she must be used to getting questions about it. And she may explain it to you if you ask in a way that is light and unthreatening. Then you can rest assured that her holding behavior is peculiar but harmless.

-*-*- Leela -*-*-
 
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