I'm worried i'm making a bad decision?

[seeinred06]

I recently filed for devorce, without my husband knowing. We have been married for 2 years and seperated for 3 months. We have a 1 1/2 year old baby together. I left and filed for devorce because he was verbally abusive to me and it was literally affecting my health. He called me a bad mom, cunt,bitch... almost every horrible name in the book. He was very controlling and got angry when i spent time with my family and friends, which wasn't that often. I had to go on prozac because i was suffering from a bad depression because of it. On the other hand i still love him. We did share great times together and it wasn't all bad. There was good times. He seems to be sorry for the pain he has caused. but i dont trust him to change. I'm very heart broken. What should i do? I don't know how to handle all this?I am not seeing anyone else. niether do i want to. I m so emotionally worn down. I have nothing to give. I am afraid of him even though he never hit me out of anger. He scares me in a way that i cant trust him. I filed for devorce because i know that that is a way that i can stop myself from reconsiling with him. This is our 3rd time seperating within the two years. Now that i left he wants marriage counseling. I dont want to go back because i dont trust him anymore. What should i do? how will this affect my son?

[seemab s]

everybody is worried about making a bad decision in life you'll just have to learn that mistakes are just mis-takes.

[sek4me]

You did the right thing.

[Seehowtheyrun]

Try taking counseling together, maybe it doesn't work...maybe it does....you won't know unless you try.You mention you still love him, I believe in second changes ( when the hard is not too great of course) why don't you try before you call it quiet...at least you can't walk away saying you tried it all and it just didn't work Good Luck

[SEEKER]

Only what is best for your baby who might not have any other role model

[seko]

Be a independent and get of this man. If you are type to need a man, I have no idea what to tell you. If he is so controlling you cant see your family or friends. Life is too short...go along with the divorce and don't talk to him. Dont be stupid.....so what if you love him get over it and take care of your child...

[selena]

You can be the only one to decide what you and your husband do. If its affecting you as badly as it seems to, then you should try to get out. However, since you have a kid, you should really try to solve your issues before taking the deasier way out. Being the kid of divorced paents is a terrible way to love, especially because you have no choice. But if its really that abusive, then you should do what you think is right.

[sehar]

seek a therapist.....u might be able to salvage ur marriage if ur husband is willing to attend an anger management class and or nurturing class like i took. good luck!

[sekcy]

You are doing the right thing with the divorce. Him feeling sorry is just part of the domestice abuse cycle. You feel bad because he has broken you down to question your every decision like you can't make these on your own. Trust yourself, be strong and do not subject yourself or your baby to this any longer.

[sekcy]

Mental abuse is the starting point for much worse. You are probably doing the right thing.An abusive male is a scary situation. They are inheriantly a controlling person, and if you go outside their control, he will want to stop you. Hopefully not at all cost.You really need to be careful until you can tell he is not going to be harmful to you in any way, as you will get a better feel how he takes getting served.Love is a power thing, and some many women think love will make it better. Be really careful that you do not trick yourself into going back thinking he will change as I am sure your estranged husband will probably tell you many times to get you to come back.