truly bisexual or just confused?

[Vanessa]

I am a very clean cut, normal 18 year old girl, I've had boyfriends throughout my high school years and have one now who I love and have been with for a year. However Ive been keeping a secret from all my friends and family. I've had sex and ongoing affairs with two women in my past, one girl who I was friends with for three years before anything started.. This was not a purely sexual relationship, I feel like I truly loved this girl,lets call her jen, who helped me through my very difficult time in my life.jen said she loved me too, and we wanted to be together but we were from completely different words(I am tall, preppy, blonde, she is black, short, indie kind of style) but we shared an amazing intellectual & emotional connection. We had sex many times and she would write me love letters and buy me presents and asked me to be her girlfriend and I wanted to be with her but constantly rejected her because I was afraid what everyone would think. It broke my heart to do this to her. She hated me for awhile, but now has a new girlfriend and seems to be ok with me. We are friends and even though it is a little awkward and tense and I am still in love with her very much even though I've had another boyfriend with me for a year now. Am I really bisexual or do you think its just confusion, something wrong with me. Because I have a much stronger sexual connection towards females, loved a girl deeply, but would never, ever consider starting a relationship with another female. What do u think, any advice would be helpful too

[faeriewings]

You're probably bi. Why not be in a relationship with her? If you love her, then it doesn't matter what other people think. But that's kinda hard if you're in another relationship.

[Rick]

You don't sound confused to me. I think you're bisexual. Just like me!

[Mangoman]

I think you are really bisexual.
You say that you would never, ever consider starting a relationship with another female...but you describe ongoing affairs with 2 women in your past (and you're only 18). Those ARE relationships (even if not ideal ones).
At 18, I had never had sex, let alone an ongoing affair, with another male. However, at 24 I had started a long-term relationship with a guy who I truly cared about.

Just because an affair was not open doesn't mean that it wasn't a deep physical and emotional relationship...and you shouldn't rule out another one at some time in the future...but right now you have a boyfriend, and as your boyfriend he should have your attention and devotion (because he might be the one for you...in which case you shouldn't start a physical relationship with anyone else).