Emma

So I'm 20, obviously I understand sex and what it is, and I've been with my boyfriend for 3 years now and we've been having sex since the start of our relationship...

But I have to really amp up for sex or get in a particular mood like a naughty mood. Which makes me think i dont understand sex...

Everytime we have sex its always like we are in sexy or naughty moods, I just dont understand how you can make love...
Like having sex and not being in a naughty or sexy mood...

I really love my boyfriend, more than anything, he is my world, i think thats why i am so confused, i feel so close to him all the time, but when we have sex, i feel least close to him because i feel like i am being someone else..

can anyone help me to understand it...?

what do i do?!?!

WhyYouSoSerious?

lol if your doing that just for sex then idk maybe you just wanna feel good but its only love making when you feel like a deep connection while doing it like a special kind of love making you know?

TIMOTHY

You're having sex the way you want. You love your boyfriend, he loves you, you're both making each other feel good the way you both like it. Thats special, even if you guys get dirty. Don't buy in to romantic hollywood love scenes. thats nonsense.

Rhapsodiie

Sex is just so...changed because of the media's representation of it. They make it seem like only a naughty, dirty thing, and that sells. Sex sells. But sex isn't just "doing the dirty" its bonding and uniting as one with your partner, sharing each others bodies and trusting them with your very self. Its a beautiful natural thing that should be done with a person you truly love and cherish. Think of it as bonding and becoming one and becoming as close as humanly possible.
..Hope that helps..

CK6621

It's possible you just have a low sex drive. Not uncommon.

Is he good looking? Loving someone and being sexually attracted to someone are not the same things.

When you love someone, you should enjoy having sex with them so I can't really say for sure.

Antonio

"Sex and love are two sides of same coin"

The only thing You have to do is be Yourself at 100%
Hugs
Antony

Sublime

I think that is actually pretty common for sex when you are young. The nature of relationships change as you approach 30 and beyond. Another problem could be that you think of sex as something to please your boyfriend rather than yourself as well? When you *really* get to know your own body, you will open up more too.