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Sorry mate, says the first one, I am a bit nervous, I lost my wife, can't find her anywhere. Second bloke replies; gee, I can't find mine either, how about we go and look for them together? Sure,...

Wine her,
Dine her,
Call her,
Hug her,
Support her,
Hold her,
Surprise her,
Compliment her,
Smile at her,
Listen to her,

in bed with another man.
"Get over it, buddy," he said. "It's not the end of the world."
"It's all right for you to say," answered his buddy. "But what
if you came home one night and caught...

to the airport.
Halfway there, the front tyre went flat. The model said, "Driver, I don't
have time to wait for road service. Can you change it yourself?"
The driver said, "Sure." He got out of...

You've heard about people who have been abducted and had their kidneys removed by black-market organ thieves.

My thighs were stolen from me during the night a few years ago. I went to sleep and...

altitude, the captain?
came on air and announced.
"Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain. Welcome to Flight 293 from London Heathrow, flying nonstop to Toronto. The weather ahead of us today...

HIH Insurance has come out of liquidation.
If the England cricket team wasn't touring we'd never see ducks.
The Red Cross has launched a wet blanket appeal.
We're actually drinking the new Vanilla...

no ,its easier to get warm than cool down

no ,its easier to get warm than cool down

and all the patients were shouting, "13....13.. ..13"

The fence was too high to see over but I saw a little gap in the planks and looked through to see what was going on.

Some bastard poked me...

had saved another from a suicide attempt by pulling him out of a bathtub, the hospital director reviewed the rescuer's file and called him into his office.

"Mr. Haroldson, your records and your...

its a constant reminder
thanks yes i am Vic in the center i have seen so much but im not in worst part we did get a decent hit though and it has erupted again its hard to , its just shocking

se.x she layed there smiling and stroking my manhood...
"Do you want more se.x?" I said
"No" she responded......
"I'm just admiring your dick...... I really miss mine!!!!!"

sporting goods store to buy a rifle. "It's for my husband," she tells the clerk.

"Did he tell you what gauge to get?" asked the clerk.

"Are you kidding?" she says. "He doesn't even know that...

LETTER FROM MANAGEMENT? Date: Wed Feb 4th 2009 09:14:44 +0000

Dear Employees,

Due to the current financial situation caused by the slowdown in the economy, Management has decided to implement a...

in the woods one day. One was a hundred years old , another was a thousand years old and the last one was an ancient vampire, nearly ten thousand years old. Eager to impress her fellow vampires, the...

was done at the local Chinese laundry, so she wrote a note and put it in the bag with the next collection of soiled clothes: 'USE MORE SOAP ON PANTIES!'
She got the clean laundry back, and was still...

sporting goods store to buy a rifle. "It's for my husband," she tells the clerk.

"Did he tell you what gauge to get?" asked the clerk.

"Are you kidding?" she says. "He doesn't even know that...

with his pet monkey.? He orders a drink and while he's drinking it the monkey is running wild. The monkey jumps up on the pool table and grabs the cue ball, sticks it in his mouth and swallows it...

yo mamma so nice

she gave me cake and lemonade

why not

my magic watch says your not wearing any underwear

she says "but i am wearing underwear"

i reply " well it must be 10 minutes fast"

There were two nuns
One of them was known as Sister Mathematical (SM),

and the other one was known as Sister Logical (SL).

It is getting dark and they are still far away from the convent.
...

I know theirs one for foundry where you can put as much stuff as you want with no money lost, but is there one for avalanche?

i dont use them its easier to just plug in