My parents got divorced suddenly. My dad left two days after Christmas, two years ago tommorow.I kept it in for six months. No one knew. I wouldn't let anyone know. To this day only 3 people know the whole story. It was unprovoked and sudden. He just came home one day and left. Since the fourth grade, I have had chronic stomachaches, anxiety, paranoia and panic attacks. I also get detached from the world. I also repeatedly put myself down and have no self confidence, think I look fat and horrible. My mother verbally abuses me too. From finding out that something traumatic may or may not have happened, my anxiety and panic attacks have gotten worse. I am kind of depressed. I haven't been able to sleep well since September, after a friend's suicide attempt. I also cut.

I would go get medicine, but my mother refuses to believe I have issues. I have panic attacks and she tells me to shut up and go away. I don't know what's wrong with me. I am almost at a breaking point. I want to kill myself because I constantly put myself down and tell myself people hate me and I constantly critize everything I do.

Please help me, I'm on the verge of committing suicide.