While driving I had vision of having everything I ever wanted, which isn't much, but I was miserable. Well, not exactly miserable. but had no emotions/feeling. Ironically, the vision was of me driving together with my daughter's mother and my daughter. Her mother and I were back together which is not exactly positive/negative (Something I want but don't really want). It did not matter because I was emotionally numb with a sense in the vision of impending doom. I had no emotions or feeling. My mind was cold and calculating. Like I really knew the meaning of life (Purposelessness) or that I knew where I was going, which leads into the next part.

The vision may have not included this but I believe I had sold my soul to the devil to get this and a few other things. Nothing like wealth or fame. Most of it was that I was back with my daughter's mother. What I received from essentially selling my soul was enough that would make me happy so that's why I was confused about not feeling anything. I am pretty much atheist though. Well, its complicated and I do go to church regularly. However, at the end of the day, I believe for the most part that this is it, our existence as it is now and nothing more.

I have had visions like this since about 8th Grade, prior to any substance use and I do not use any now and have not for several years. The visions would be a random assortment of mental images or a entire situation in my mind's eye. After that I would have a panic attack because of a leftover sense of impending doom. I still get visions but rarely panic attacks.

Like for example, I might have a vision where I got in trouble with the police, for what I probably wouldn't know but the doom/danger/panic would be there.

If you could give an interpretation like someone would for a dream I would appreciate it. I think some of this is symbolic but some might be repressed feelings or even repression in regards to other situations I have been in.