Thread: Future daughter-in-law doesn't want to combine holiday celebrations. Should I...

...be alarmed by this? My son will spend Thanksgiving with me and the rest of our family. FDIL

will spend the day with her family only. My son is going to her family for Xmas. They will not stop in and visit with us. I suggested that maybe our family could visit with hers on Xmas, since we have only briefly met her folks-her family lives 3 hours away. FDIL flatly said that no, she wanted to keep the holidays seperate. Am I right to be worried-what if FDIL never wants to spend holidays with us again and only goes to her folks?

Sounds to me like she is being a little self-centered. But that's my opinion. When you combine two households, you have to compromise.

Maybe she is doing this for another reason though. Did your family make her feel uncomfortable at some point or treat her badly? If not then I wouldn't worry too much about it. At least your son will be there. If you guys did something to make her feel like she wasn't welcome, then I would try to fix the problem so that you guys can be together.

Maybe suggest to your son that you guys alternate holidays between the families.