I'm righting a novel about the female twin of a male/female birth. Being raised as the as a tool by her father to kill her twin brother because her grandmother stole the brother away at birth to ensure that her son, the twin's father and the land's king is killed. The story is set while she searches for her brother by command of her father, bu unknown to him she is also under the orders of her grandmother to find the brother(who she had had hidden away from even her own eyes to make sure he wasn't found to soon), but not to kill instead to work with him and help him kill their father. this all happens because the day the twins are born a prophecy is spoken across the land.


"A dying wish fullfilled, the Father’s life will be ended by the son’s hand;
The first born will gain the thrown, not by right but by blood and steel

Led by lies and hatred the second born shall be controlled;
But by who's hand shall guide that child is yet to be seen

Kill the first before the 18th year has begun;
Or else darkness will consume the land"


What do you think when you read this? And grammer wise how is the prorophecy setup?
I also want to fit in the fact that the firstborn needs to die before the twins' 18th birthday but I'm not sure that I fit it in right.
I tried the rhyming idea, it just didn't work, plus making prophecies rhyme seems kind of nub-ish to me
I really don't care if anything outside the prophecy is misspelled, I wrote in like under a minute to to give you guys the basic layout to help understand the prophecy. If the fact I misspelled writing wrong makes you not want to help where it matters, then you're a turd eater.
Oooh, nice Sam. Thanks =D
And trust me, there is a lot not being said in the prophecy compared the the real story.
i changed the last part to

"Let first born blood spill before the eighteenth year;
Else dark will devour the world"


Yes, WORLD
a prophecy is a foretelling of the future in a mystic setting. It never tells all the details because the future can always be changed
Else darkness* will devour the world"
it was said the night the twin's were born. Not years before O-o that is a good idea though. will think over it.
I also changed the last part of the prophecy, as I stated and gave already.


IF you can think of a better version, please don't be afraid to give it.