My mom blows everything out of proportion, complains all the time, and talks

[LindsayM]

about dying. Is she depressed? My mom has a history of depression and antidepressant-usage, but she isn't on any meds right now. She is in her late forties, and is currently in college to finally earn herself a teaching degree. But it stresses her out soooo badly and it seems like she hates it; she constantly forces her problems onto the rest of us family members even though most of us are also in school and have our own problems. It's getting frustrating and becoming a problem for me, but I'm also worried about her. She has a heart condition that will later require surgery, but she has talked about skipping the surgery and "just dying". She and my father are still married and living together, but I feel like he's given up on trying to help her because he doesn't seem completely concerned at this time. Maybe he's too busy trying to support my siblings. Maybe he feels like he'll never figure out how to help her; she has always been very unaccepting of help from us.

I'm just not sure whether or not she complains and yells at us because it's her way of asking for help, or if it's just how she copes.

Depressed? Suicidal? Should I try to intervene in some way?

[Unregistered]

My mom is exactly the same. I feel sorry for my dad

[Unregistered]

I think my dad has given up trying to help her too. My mom is a clever person but she doesn't want to help herself. She has been depressed her whole life but never done anything about it. Like you, my mom also pushes the burden onto the rest of the family. My sister has just moved out and I don't blame her. I hardly spend any time at home if I can help it. I've been there for my mom in the past and still am but it's hard when you have your own problems. People who are depressed live in a bubble, talking about their own problems constantly as this is intensified for them. At the end of the day, my best advice is be there for her but don't try to solve her issues for her. She is an adult and has choices in life. It's up to her to recognise that she needs help. If she's depressed then she probably won't hear any advice that you try to give her. Don't let it interfere with your studies, it's important that you forge your own path in life. Good luck :]