I still haven't met my boyfriends parents, is this ok?

My boyfriend and I have been together for 2 years. His mom has not accepted me "yet". She has never even met me, apparently it has nothing to do with me, she is just caught up with the fact she is worried about her only grandchild not being apart of her life if my boyfriend doesn't work it out with his ex. After 2 years and clearly no way of working out their relationship...my boyfriend just keeps saying she will eventually accept "us". This leaves for many holidays I'm left waiting for him to finish with his "family" before we can do our thing. Not to mention a bitterness and hurt feeling I have in my heart. He says he sticks up for us, but how am I to know if I'm not there. My family feels he should do more, like refusing to join the family table himself if his feelings aren't accepted. What's worse is his ex is not only accepted still but lives with his mom while she gets her life stabalized. It's not an ugly situation by any means since their break was no ugly nor do her and I have any hard feelings. She has no issue with us, nor does she have any part in his mom's feelings. And she does not have a desire to work it out...anymore. So in no way does this problem have anything to do with his ex. I hate to ask him to make a choice and I know I never will ask him to...but wish he would make that decision on his own. How do I get him to make a move without causing problems between us? Yet, I am weak when it comes to his son, he is little still so whenever it's a holiday or just for dinner and his mom wants to spend time with her grandson I always say GO, I will never say no, it's not his fault and I would never take the time between them away. I feel enough is enough though when it comes to our relationship not being respected and he is only showing his mom her behavior is acceptable...not to mention I haven't met anyone else in the family either because of it...WE LIVE 8 MINUTES AWAY! Keep in mind, I have done nothing but wait patiently and try to remain respectful of who she is regardless of not receiving the same respect in return! I am 37 and he is a couple years younger so we are grown adults...and I have never been in a position with a boyfriend or a friend for that matter where I wasn't accepted by the family so this is new to me and I don't know how to handle. However, I was always raised to respect and family is always more important then anyone, but my parents have always respected me and my feelings and not ruled over me as a dictatorship. Him and I want to move to the next level of our relationship but I feel like this is a HUGE issue even if he thinks it's something that will blow over. I personally feel offended he can even face his mom without animosity but I am the outsider still wondering why I'm being punished. Do I walk and not deal with this drama? Because this man is the one I want to spend the rest of my life with....sadly, I'm not sure I even want to meet her anymore...but family is important so it's going to be necessary..but more importantly I just want to be respected for who I am in his life...and her grandson's at this point. HELP! Am I making this into more then what I should?

Hi, Im just curious what the outcome of your situation has been?? I am in a very similar situation: Ive never met my bf's family. His mother called me once and left a message saying I would never be welcome in her home. She is very close to his ex and is constantly telling my bf that he needs to leave me and reunite with her. The ex goes to his family's home for holidays so obviously I am not invited. I really wish he would stick up for me but he says that his mom is crazy and that there's nothing he can do about it. I would never ask him not to see his family but part of me feels so disrespected that he allows his mother to arrange for him to spend his holidays with his ex while I am left out. We are about to have a son together and I dont know if this will make things better or worse, Im almost scared to find out! So anyway, Im just curious as to whether or not you've found any kind of solution to your situation or have any advice that might be helpful. Thanks!

I know how you feel. I have been with a man for 21 months and still have not met his parents, sister or even his twin brother. They do not want to meet me because I am divorced and have 2 children. He still continues to go to all family functions which leaves me in the cold and left with an unfortable feeling inside. But yet he spends time with my kids, my family friends and everyone. He is 38 yrs old and still lives at home with his mom, yet his mother is divorced as well and has a boyfriend. I just dont get it.