Conan

And they come from near and far.
Some came on bicycles,
And some of them came by car.
Y'know, before they could enter,
Or even take a look,
They had to take their asshole off,
And hang it on a hook.
But before they even got seated,
Every mother, pup, and sire,
An old dog hollered from the back,
"Run for your life. It's a FIRE!"
The crowd of dogs began to panic,
And nobody stopped to look.
They grabbed the nearest asshole,
Off the very nearest hook.
And this is why, even today,
A dog will drop a nice juicy bone,
And go to smell another dog's ass,
To see if it's not his own.