Thread: hey there,i am gay & i have a boyfriend,and i need to ask a question about something?

so you see,my boyfriend is still friends with his ex,thats cool ya know..cause me and the ex are always friends,and i know sometimes its hard to switch off old feelings for a person but lately i reckon they are starting to get abit closer again..i feel like an outsider sometimes.and ya know the saying '3's a crowd' and all that..and i feel like i am the one intruding on them..heck,not that the ex is intruding really..but i got them gazing into each others eyes a few times and blush when they remember i am there.not sure if i should do anything or just see what happens,but the bottom line is..whatever is gonna happen i know i wont like it.
i dont want to ask them to chill abit from seeing each other as it will come across as me being jealous(i admit i am abit ok?)
i dont think i can win either way.

any advice?

Ex's rarely make good friends. (Sometmes, but rarely)

They are usually an ex for good reason and can be very interfering.

I dont stop my partner being in contact with his ex's and he doesnt with me (except one, and rightly so). But all ex's are just a minor part of our life.

that sounds like what my bf did, but turns out it was a test to see how jealous i would get, i don't know what he is like but all i can say is good luck.

Ex's rarely make good friends. (Sometmes, but rarely)

They are usually an ex for good reason and can be very interfering.

I dont stop my partner being in contact with his ex's and he doesnt with me (except one, and rightly so). But all ex's are just a minor part of our life.

Idk.
If you don't stand your ground things might lead to cheating. I'm not saying it definitely will, but if he sees it doesn't both you, he will see it as you saying it's ok and might lead to more.
You shouldn't have to compete with his ex. I think you should just say you are starting to feel a little uncomfortable.
If he respects you, he will tone things down, if not, then you can find better.

It is never easy for noone to see his / her partner look again at his / her ex, especially if this looks as some intimacy and renewed complicity between the two.

Being jealous or possessive is nevertheless the right way to do as it generally pushes your partner further away.

Now you may ask him to tell you honnestly how hwe feels for his ex and why he feels so, may be he is missing something in your relationship.

From thereon, chooice is yours do you feel your relationship is worth the fight for. Then fight for it (not a violent fight against the competitive ex) no be better than him and give to your partner more caring and more sharing then before. Surprise him, break your routine.

The choice is yours!

I would just talk to your boyfriend. Ask him how he would feel in your shoes. If he's not willing to talk about it, just leave it. He's not worth it!

It is never easy for noone to see his / her partner look again at his / her ex, especially if this looks as some intimacy and renewed complicity between the two.

Being jealous or possessive is nevertheless the right way to do as it generally pushes your partner further away.

Now you may ask him to tell you honnestly how hwe feels for his ex and why he feels so, may be he is missing something in your relationship.

From thereon, chooice is yours do you feel your relationship is worth the fight for. Then fight for it (not a violent fight against the competitive ex) no be better than him and give to your partner more caring and more sharing then before. Surprise him, break your routine.

The choice is yours!

you should tell him!
he is being really unfair, you shouldn't worry about whether you look jealous.
If he is starting to like his ex again then why carry on the misery and pain of a relationship that isn't working, You might not like it, but eventually you will move on good luck xx

There's nothing wrong with coming across as a bit insecure! You need to be honest in relationships.

There is always the possibility that he is playing to try to make you jealous. And if you find out that he is, you'd better give him a massive telling off!!

If you simply sat him down at a good time, even go for a few drinks to get him in the mood for opening up, and said very gently, or even jokingly.... "ok, so do I have anything to worry about with you and your ex?! If you still like him, please tell me now and don't string me along".

That's a whole lot different from festering over it and one day errupting in front of his ex - or saying something like "You can't see your ex anymore because you clearly want to bang him." ;-)

Trust has to be earnt in relationships. It is very possible to be just friends with exes. I'm still friends with my ex and even though I've been with my boyfriend for almost 5 years, he still occasionally teases me about her and I can see that he might be a tiny bit insecure. As soon as I reassure him, everything's fine.

If your boyfriend really wants to be with you, he'll be horrified that you are even a tiny bit worried about it.