married? I know you need the non-custodial parents permission for a step parent to adopt, but what happens if you don't know who it is? I have absolutely no idea who her father is or how to track down any of the men I slept with in that time. So there is no way to find her birth father. My fiance however has raised her since she was 9 months old, she is now 2 1/2. We also have another daughter who is now 11 months, and plan on getting married next summer. We would like him to adopt her, but don't know if he can or what we need to do.