I am an older man (I don't want to give my exact age because of possible bias) and have had a lot of relationships over the years. I have never been married, would have liked to. However, since May of this year, I believe I have met the woman of my dreams. I have NEVER felt the intense feelings for her as with any other woman I've ever known. Please do not treat this as a 'joke' or lightly, as I am suffering, which I will shortly explain. I 'met' her on a support website. I have a condition and would rather not say what it is but I am disabled from it for many years. This woman contacted me from a message I put on the site. She is in California, I am in New Mexico, not far apart. We started talking on the phone and emailing frequently. She is the most caring woman I have ever known. We have known each other now 6 months and we are getting closer and closer emotionally all the time. About three months ago I believe I started to develop 'love' feelings for her...stronger than I have felt for another human being. At the same time I started to develop some very annoying physical symptoms. I started having persistent nausea, always sick to my stomach. Then I lost my appetite...I mean completely. I can go the whole day now without any hunger pangs or feeling hungry. I have to force feed myself. I have lost 15 pounds. I am always very weak, get faint at times, and am not sleeping well. So naturally I went to the doctor. For the last three months, they have run EVERY test in the book and can find NOTHING wrong with me! The other day one of my doctors said "Are you in love"?? sort of jokingly, but also sort of seriously. I said, "funny you should ask that...yes I do believe I am in love". She said that may very well be the source of all your physical problems, since we cannot find anything wrong with you. I said, "OK, but how do I resolve this, or feel better?" She said have you met her? I said not yet, but plan to shortly, like in a month. She said that is good, go meet her and see if your symptoms improve. Also try to find out how she feels about you. I said I think she "likes me a lot", but not sure if love...she says she "needs to meet me first', which I find reasonable. I have read up on lovesickness and something related to it called "limerance" and I have ALL the signs and symptoms, so it could very well be I am just in love and in deep and hitting me very hard. Problem is I can't stand this physical suffering...I am miserable, yet I am blissful, if you can understand that. I want some advice from people who have or are going through this and tips on how to handle it to feel better. I am sick every day and it is no fun at all. I am going to meet her finally in about 3 weeks. I pray all goes well between us. Because if it doesn't that scares me. I have read people committing suicide over unrequited love or being rejected. I doubt that will happen but you never know. Next time I see my therapist I am going to talk to her about this and get her advice. I want to be taken SERIOUSLY, as this is no game. As I said I am really suffering and that is why I came on here hoping I can get some help. I am looking all over the net for help on this...I can't find anything, which is frustrating. Just lots and lots of information about it. I can't believe that I have been blinded to this all this time. I never thought it could be this. But since they can't find anything wrong with me, it most likely is this. I just want relief as I continue to pursue my relationship with her. She feels bad that she is 'causing' this...I tell her not to be sorry and it is not her fault. I am doing it to myself, apparently. I would like to hear from both men and women alike, it doesn't matter. Teenagers are okay, but would prefer older people to respond. I think I have told you most everything you need to know, if you have any questions, ask, and I will edit. Finally, as I've said please do not treat this lightly...I am suffering and looking for relief and answers to help me through this. Thank you.
God...that is EXACTLY not the kind of response I was looking for! Totally unfeeling and immature.
God...that is EXACTLY not the kind of response I was looking for! Totally unfeeling and immature.