BabsBabbers
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- Mar 14, 2011
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I am writing a book about a caretaker on a job who is terrorized by unknown assailants at a house where she's watching an elderly woman. I know I posted it, but this time I want revisions!
Chapter 4- We don’t bite
“Oh Rick, stop it!” giggled Portia. Portia and Rick sat in the backseat of Rick’s Jeep by the lake, which was a yard away from the cabin in which they were partying. They were in the middle of an intense make out session. He and Portia had gone to a friend’s family’s cabin for a party.
“Ok, I win,” Rick breathed a sigh of relief. His breath was intoxicated by the smell of beer and party snacks. “Now you have to chug.”
Richard pulled out a can of beer and handed it fiercely to Portia. He and Portia had made a bet of who could survive the make out session the longest. It had gone on for five minutes and Rick won.
Portia stared down at the bottle with an unsure gaze. She had made this promise to herself. She just couldn’t drink. “Rick, we’re 18.”
“Oh, come on!”
“Seriously, I don’t think it’s a good idea,” argued Portia. “Who’s the designated driver?”
“I am,” Rick assured her. “You know I can handle alcohol.”
“I’m not so sure after last weekend,” she told him, staring at him with a you-know-what-I’m-referring-to look.
“Things got out of hand at the last party, I admit.”
“Out of hand? I had to drive you to the damn hospital, that’s out of hand!”
“Whatever,” Rick started. Suddenly, there was a knock coming from the trunk.
Portia gasped and plunged upward from her seat. “Did you hear that?”
“Yeah, it’s fine.”
“Rick, I want to get out of here,” she said, whimpering. “It’s way too late.”
“I know this party didn’t go as planned but,” Rick stopped midsentence. There it was again. A loud, forceful knock. “I’m going to go check it out.”
“Okay,” Portia said, crossing her arms to keep warm. Breathing heavily, she took out a cigarette from her purse. She took a match out of the compartment nearest her in the car and lit up the cigarette. Her phone beeped. Startled, Portia grabbed her phone and checked her messages. A text message beeped onto her screen. It said “YOU’RE NEXT.” The number was blocked.
“Rick?” Portia called. “Rick?” There was no answer. Carrying her phone, Portia got out of the car.
“Rick is this some kind of joke?” She held the phone up. “I don’t think it’s funny.” There was a faint cry in the distance, carried on the breeze. Portia was scared now. She ran to get back to the house, but tripped on a twig.
“RICK!” Portia screamed. She looked down to find the edge of the twig impaled into her ankle. “RICK!” All of a sudden, Portia heard a scream in the distance. It was definitely a scream this time. Then there was a bang.
“HELP!” she called desperately. Portia looked behind her, only to find shadows in the distance. Overcome by panic, Portia got up and tried to walk, but fell.
“PLEASE STOP! GO AWAY!”
Getting up once more, she hopped and found it more successful. Pretty soon, she was hopping furiously towards the cabin until her leg gave in. Looking behind her, she noticed the strangers had disappeared. There was eeriness in the air and a slight mist started to form.
Portia crawled closer to the cabin in a slow manor. Her ankle throbbed and she found it hard not to just give up, but she grasped the ground with her fingers and slid on her stomach. Looking ahead, she discovered the cabin was not very far away. This came as a great delight to her, and she smiled.
All of a sudden two shadowy figures approached her and grabbed both of her legs. One of them yanked the twig from her ankle. The other wiped a cloth on her face just as she began to scream. Portia moaned until she couldn’t stay awake. She was passed out. One of the figures took her into their arms and carried her. The mysterious assailants arrived at a clearing in the woods, where a white truck stood in the middle.
“Don’t worry,” one of them whispered into the unconscious Portia’s ear. The attacker removed the cloth from her face, which was now covered in blood and kissed her lips. “We don’t bite.”
Chapter 4- We don’t bite
“Oh Rick, stop it!” giggled Portia. Portia and Rick sat in the backseat of Rick’s Jeep by the lake, which was a yard away from the cabin in which they were partying. They were in the middle of an intense make out session. He and Portia had gone to a friend’s family’s cabin for a party.
“Ok, I win,” Rick breathed a sigh of relief. His breath was intoxicated by the smell of beer and party snacks. “Now you have to chug.”
Richard pulled out a can of beer and handed it fiercely to Portia. He and Portia had made a bet of who could survive the make out session the longest. It had gone on for five minutes and Rick won.
Portia stared down at the bottle with an unsure gaze. She had made this promise to herself. She just couldn’t drink. “Rick, we’re 18.”
“Oh, come on!”
“Seriously, I don’t think it’s a good idea,” argued Portia. “Who’s the designated driver?”
“I am,” Rick assured her. “You know I can handle alcohol.”
“I’m not so sure after last weekend,” she told him, staring at him with a you-know-what-I’m-referring-to look.
“Things got out of hand at the last party, I admit.”
“Out of hand? I had to drive you to the damn hospital, that’s out of hand!”
“Whatever,” Rick started. Suddenly, there was a knock coming from the trunk.
Portia gasped and plunged upward from her seat. “Did you hear that?”
“Yeah, it’s fine.”
“Rick, I want to get out of here,” she said, whimpering. “It’s way too late.”
“I know this party didn’t go as planned but,” Rick stopped midsentence. There it was again. A loud, forceful knock. “I’m going to go check it out.”
“Okay,” Portia said, crossing her arms to keep warm. Breathing heavily, she took out a cigarette from her purse. She took a match out of the compartment nearest her in the car and lit up the cigarette. Her phone beeped. Startled, Portia grabbed her phone and checked her messages. A text message beeped onto her screen. It said “YOU’RE NEXT.” The number was blocked.
“Rick?” Portia called. “Rick?” There was no answer. Carrying her phone, Portia got out of the car.
“Rick is this some kind of joke?” She held the phone up. “I don’t think it’s funny.” There was a faint cry in the distance, carried on the breeze. Portia was scared now. She ran to get back to the house, but tripped on a twig.
“RICK!” Portia screamed. She looked down to find the edge of the twig impaled into her ankle. “RICK!” All of a sudden, Portia heard a scream in the distance. It was definitely a scream this time. Then there was a bang.
“HELP!” she called desperately. Portia looked behind her, only to find shadows in the distance. Overcome by panic, Portia got up and tried to walk, but fell.
“PLEASE STOP! GO AWAY!”
Getting up once more, she hopped and found it more successful. Pretty soon, she was hopping furiously towards the cabin until her leg gave in. Looking behind her, she noticed the strangers had disappeared. There was eeriness in the air and a slight mist started to form.
Portia crawled closer to the cabin in a slow manor. Her ankle throbbed and she found it hard not to just give up, but she grasped the ground with her fingers and slid on her stomach. Looking ahead, she discovered the cabin was not very far away. This came as a great delight to her, and she smiled.
All of a sudden two shadowy figures approached her and grabbed both of her legs. One of them yanked the twig from her ankle. The other wiped a cloth on her face just as she began to scream. Portia moaned until she couldn’t stay awake. She was passed out. One of the figures took her into their arms and carried her. The mysterious assailants arrived at a clearing in the woods, where a white truck stood in the middle.
“Don’t worry,” one of them whispered into the unconscious Portia’s ear. The attacker removed the cloth from her face, which was now covered in blood and kissed her lips. “We don’t bite.”