Recent content by Timinatore

Newspaper (noun) A daily periodical, sometimes delivered to your front door in paper form. I'll tweet you the official definition, later

I blow copious amounts of cigarette smoke on them, then beat them with a live chicken. (a freshly slaughtered chicken is acceptable)

I thought you were being kind when you said I was hung like a pimple. I've been called worse... I'm married.

My cat likes to say, "hello" by sticking her chocolate starfish in my face. My vet says she's, "presenting". I call it disgusting.

You just need a few catch phrases like, "That's what she said" or "Rectum? Damn near killed him". You need to get back on that horse, sweetie. giddy-up!

It's very hurtful when it's directed at me. But I find it hilarious when someone else is getting burned.

massager with pulsating jets? Don't judge me.

it..........? .....am I gay?

...taking a medication called, "Colonix"? Fire in the hole!

...taking a medication called, "Colonix"? Fire in the hole!

It counts towards college credit but you need to eat there a minimum of 3 times a week. Is your colon really up for that?

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=Aqj4uyZTuBF7S_kF.fckOGbty6IX;_ylv=3?qid=20090617151023AACpK1A&show=7#profile-info-f1DxucLAaa

car wash? While answering this question, please enjoy the soothing sounds of Rose Royce in this classic from the 70's. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JXaI-xsyYTQ

for a week from work? I was crunching the numbers. It’s almost not worth me taking vacation time off.

car wash? While answering this question, please enjoy the soothing sounds of Rose Royce in this classic from the 70's. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JXaI-xsyYTQ